How Love Really Works

What love is and how it really works is a topic up for debate. Nobody has ever really been able to define love or explain it. However, love has been dissected enough to be broken down into three stages which can help to explain more about how it works.

Relationships will go through these phases until love is actually materialized. Each stage plays an important role in shaping the love in a relationship. What happens during the first two stages is very indicative of how deep and strong the love in the relationship ends up being.

The first stage is lust. Lust is the part of love that is defined by pure sexual attraction. Lust is the natural reaction that comes from the desire to mate. It is the most simple form of love and the most common form of love. Many people ponder if what they feel is lust or love. The easiest distinction is that lust is physical, while love is emotional.

Following lust is attraction. Attraction is a stronger feeling where passion comes in to play. A person usually knows they are in the attraction stage because they start to feel physical signs. People in the attraction phase usually have problems thinking rationally; they feel that their partner is perfect without flaws. Attraction is the getting to know you phase of love where a couple seeks to learn more about this person.

The last stage of love is attachment. This is the deeply set emotional feelings; it is love. This is when the reality of the romance is clear and you begin to feel that you would like to be committed to each other. It is when love is deeply rooted. The attachment stage is when love is actually realized. It is the most serious stage as well.

All three stages of love work together to produce love. It has been shown the stronger the attachment phase the stronger the love ends up being. So, each stage in its own right is important to producing a strong love. They each can help explain why we feel certain things when we are falling in love.

It may not be too important when you are going through the process of falling in love, but understanding how each step works helps us to get one step closer to being able to truly define what love is and how it works.

Love may not be so easy to decipher when it comes to your own relationships. Love is no doubt something indefinable. It is one of the strongest feelings human can have. It is one of the most important feelings humans can have. Love means so much that we believe in it even though no one can tell us how love works.

Jane Saeman runs a site called http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com along with info on dating and relationships on her blog at http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com/blog2

Humor in Relationships

When asked the top traits desired in a relationship, most people are likely to list humor as one. Humor is something that seems to speak to the human soul. People use humor in many different ways, including to help nurture and maintain relationships. Everyone has encountered someone in their life who can make them laugh and they cherish the person and the relationship for that. Humor in relationships is a really good factor that can help make a relationship last.

There are many reasons why humor is important to relationships. The following explains a bit about how humor affects a relationship and the benefits it has.

- Humor can create a bond. Humor when used correctly can bring people together. It can make people like each other. People love having a good time and laughing is associated with a good time. The body reacts to humor in a way that people associate a humorous person with good feelings. That is why funny people always seem to have a lot of friends.
- Humor can open up communication. Just as humor creates a bond between people it also creates a feeling of kinship or trust. People feel it is easier to talk to someone who is humorous or uses humor often. Humor used in a constructive manner can really be a great way to improve upon communication in a relationship.
- Humor can change a situation. Most people have used humor to cover up something embarrassing. It is common because humor has a way of being able to shift the focus and change the situation.

Humor is not just a fun weekend night out activity. Humor can be found in everyday life. A person who can find humor in anything is someone who is likely to be well liked. People prefer someone who is happy to someone who is grumpy and funny people just tend to be happy people.

Humor can be used negatively, though. Negative humor can destroy relationships. It can create tension and it can be very destructive. Humor should never be used to belittle someone or to embarrass someone. Humor should always be upbeat and keep that crazy, funny edge to it.

Humor in relationships is a great stepping stone. Many times, though, people find a relationship that is only built on humor fades quickly. Humor alone cannot sustain a relationship. A relationship needs other factors in order to grow and last. Humor in relationships, though, is a great addition and is always welcomed. Everyone loves a good laugh and by using humor in relationships a person is likely to find they are generally more happy and their relationships are longer lasting then people who leave humor out of their relationships.

Jane Saeman runs a site called http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com along with info on dating and relationships on her blog at http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com/blog2

The Single Biggest Killer of Relationships

Romantic relationships are difficult. The fact is clear that over 50% of all marriages end in divorce. That is a staggering figure and one that we should all be working towards lowering. Marriage can be such a good thing. Marriage is beneficial and it is wonderful when it is between two people who are good for each other. Even in relationships that are not marriages, failure is high. The single biggest killer of relationships is so simple and so easy to overcome that it is shocking.

You are probably guilty of this relationship killer and do not even know it. The single biggest killer of relationships is expectations. Having and setting expectations is the best way to ruin a relationship.

What happens is a person goes into a relationship or during the course of a relationship develops expectations for their partner. They so strongly desire their partner meets these expectations that they become blinded to the partner they really have. Even if the partner tries to meet the expectations it will never be exactly what their partner wants. This is because expectations in relationships are most often unobtainable.

When our expectations do not get met we begin fighting and there’s no way to work it out because our expectations will never be fulfilled. So, it goes on until the relationship ends.

One of the reasons we set expectations is because we all have this preconceived notion of what we want in our ideal mate. When we do get into a relationship it is likely the person meets some of our ideal mate qualities, but probably not all of them. Due to the fact that they are so close to our perfect mate, we start to believe that they can reach the goals of being our ideal mate.

These expectations form and the relationship is doomed. Expectations can cause resentment and frustration. They place unrealistic demands on our partner and start to make them feel as if they are good enough.

Expectation are so harmful that even the most ideal couple can be ruined by them. If a person harbors these expectations then they are likely going to surface at some point. The best thing to do with expectations is to forget about them.

Letting expectations grow and feeding them is only adding fuel to the fire. Soon those expectations will come out and then the relationship is in trouble. It is a matter of working through them yourself. You have to accept that your partner is who they are. You can not expect to change them and you can not expect to mold them into whatever it is you expected them to be. If you are so bothered that they do not meet your expectations then perhaps you are with the wrong person after all.

Jane Haller runs a site called http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com along with info on dating and relationships on her blog at http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com/blog2

How to Establish Physical Contact Within the First Three Minutes

Whenever you’re on a date or meeting a woman for the first time, you must know how to build attraction. Without it, you won’t be able to rapport or chemistry.

Now one of the best ways to build intimacy between you and a woman is by establishing physical contact. Once you’ve touched a woman, it’s easy to transition into being intimate and perhaps kissing her.

The problem is establishing physical contact with a woman can be hard thing if you just met her.

Fortunately there are a few different tricks you can use that’ll help you break the touching barrier within the first three minutes of meeting a woman. In the next few minutes, I’ll list 5 different ways you can touch a woman in a non-aggressive manner.

Here we go:

Touch her to emphasize a point

When you’re first in a conversation with a woman, you can quickly break the touching barrier by touching her arm to emphasize a point.

So when you’re having a conversation, you should lightly touch her arm or shoulder as a natural part of the conversation. If it comes across as casual, then you’ll be able to break the barrier without appearing to be creepy or too aggressive.

Do a personality test

There are specific personality tests, like palm reading, where you’re required to touch a woman. What I like about using this technique is you’ve established physical contact while demonstrating a skill to a woman. If you can do this as a natural part of a conversation you’ll raise your value and start holding hands with her at the same time!

Play games with her

Playfulness is an important part of all dating conversations. One thing women look for in a man is a great sense of humor. So it’s important to demonstrate you’re a fun and interesting person.

What this means is you should try acting in a playful manner when during your initial conversation. The key point here is to do things that’ll require touching her.

For instance, you should do things like thumb or arm wrestling (make sure you’re doing this in a mock manner). In addition, you can try doing a few funny things that require you to draw on her arm.

Just remember to keep the mood light-hearted and fun!

Cocky/funny techniques

Cocky/funny is a great way to show both a humorous and slightly arrogant attitude. The idea behind this personality is to do a push/pull on her. On moment you’re saying nice things, then you’re being sarcastic and busting your chops.

A lot of cocky/funny can involve physical contact. For instance you can give her a quick high five, shove her lightly on her shoulder when you’re joking around, or give her bump hip check when you walk by her.

Also if you’re walking together, you can fool around and walk her into things.

Just remember that cocky/funny involves a specific kind of attitude. She must understand that you’re having fun and playing, not that you’re an arrogant jerk.

Do chivalrous things

If you’re on a date, there are many ways to establish physical contact while walking with her. For instance, you could open a door and lead her in with your hand on her lower back.

Another technique is to offer your arm as you’re walking into a place.

Finally if you’re walking through a crowd of people, be the first to go through it. Then offer your hand to guide her through.

Establishing physical contact with a woman should be done within the first few minutes. When you do this quickly, you’ll increase your chances of kissing her and making things more intimate.

If you follow the 5 tips I’ve described in this article, you’ll be able to break the touching barrier in a way that’ll increase attraction and interest.

Want to learn 50 different ways to meet, approach and attract women? If so, take a look at Scott Patterson’s Free eBook which provides 50 tips for approaching, attracting, and dating ANY woman.

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Romantic Birthday Ideas: How to Plan a Romantic Birthday

When your sweetheart’s birthday is just around the corner, you want to make it romantic and memorable. A birthday, like anniversaries, is a good occasion to relive your romance. If you are looking to impress your sweetheart with a romantic and memorable day, but remain clueless on how to plan a romantic birthday, here are some romantic birthday ideas to make the most of your celebration. Your sweetheart will love you all the more.

One of the nicest things someone can do for another person is to show appreciation. The most romantic birthday ideas are ones that offer some sentiment but also communicate a lot of appreciative elements. There are a number of different ways to show that you are thankful that you are involved with such a great person.

A wonderful approach to showing gratitude is to share notes of thoughtfulness or thanks. These romantic birthday ideas do require a lot of in depth thought and some may take a lot of time to produce but I have a trick that you might want to consider after considering the approach.

Write little notes that covey messages that are personal and ones that show gratitude and thoughtfulness on every day, which means 365 (yes, 366 in the case of leap years) times. Each little message is put on a small piece of paper that is folded and placed in a jar. These romantic birthday ideas are to be read each and every day for an entire year.

The person who receives the jar opens one note each morning or each evening throughout the entire year until the next birthday. The romantic birthday ideas are magnificent in that they are received every day for the entire year. This is a great approach to communicating thoughtful gratitude for someone you love dearly.

How about planning a weekend trip to Lake Michigan. If you plan at least a month ahead, you’ll be able to find some pretty competive airfares if you live far away. People do come from all over the world to visit this wonder of nature. Breathtaking views may be found all around the lake. Romantic restaurants abound. This idea is a knockout with anyone’s beloved!

For women, jewelry is always preceived as a gift and rubies, sapphires, emeralds and diamonds always top the list of gifts for wonderfully romantic birthday ideas. Birth stone rings are also nice. Do not be stingy. Purchase the best quality you can afford. Even a one-point diamond in gold earrings will move her to tears. Flowers are a absolute must!

Men are more difficult, but not impossible! There’s theatre, symphonies, ballet and opera if he is into these activities. Some guys who enjoy fishing would consider a day fishing together at the lake to be a very romantic birthday idea. So you just need to zero in on their favorite thing to do if they’re a more rugged kind of guy.

The most important thing to remember is to choose gifts and activities that show thoughtfulness on your part, so they know you really care.

Leng Chun Hung writes essential and practical tips for people struggling to find partners. Visit http://www.datingtips404.com/dating-tips/wise-and-timeless-dating-tips-how-to-attract-women.php to find out romantic birthday ideas on how to plan a romantic birthday.

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