Is Cultural Incompetence Putting up Walls Where You Work?
On Cultural Incompetence, Dr. Amaal V.E. Tokars states: “When you look around your place of employment, would you be surprised to see a wide variety of nationalities represented? Many would not. Today, most companies try to preserve some degree of cultural competence, accepting and understanding the value of cultural diversity in the work environment. Employers boasting policies of “equal opportunity” pervade our society.
However, there is some evidence showing these companies only support cultural diversity to a certain degree –just enough to reduce their being liable for discrimination. Such employers are tolerant to a wide array of cultures and let them co-exist with the cultural majority, but only to the bare minimum. There is a subtle fear underlying this aversion to anything cultural, a fear of offending or being offended, a fear of what is different, a fear of disruption of the norm. So, despite the employees of various cultures being hired into companies claiming “equal opportunity,” in general, it seems to be desired that the semblance of mainstream homogeneity is preserved.
Why should we feel afraid of slipping out of the mainstream? Doesn’t our melting-pot society require it? There are several factors contributing to this form of cultural oppression in the workplace. The first is personal prejudice — the type of individual prejudice the cultural “other” experience in their daily lives. Every day people of different cultures and backgrounds are stereotyped for how they look, speak, and dress. The workplace is just one more arena for the culturally different to be categorized. This type of prejudice is common enough, though, to be targeted as a problem in the work environment. Frequent seminars are given to educate on ways to eliminate this type of prejudice.
Let’s get to the root of the problem, shall we? There exist certain systemic factors in our society that perpetuate something called structural racism. (Think of ‘white privilege’ for a moment.) This unintentional form of racism helps inequality seem the norm. Unrecognized, this problem continues on unchecked. Sadly, the discourse on diversity in workplace seminars rarely touches upon this type of prejudice and its connection to individual racism. Who is to blame for this exclusion? Fault could partly be placed on the presenters, who may not be well-versed in this type of prejudice.
It could also be that the culture of the particular workplace does not see this issue as important enough to discuss as a factor contributing to individual prejudice. Whatever the reason, our adult education is lacking for it. If employers want to teach their employees to be critically conscious of the world around them, aspects of cultural competence must be introduced into these seminars. In fact, it must be introduced into the climate of the workplace as a whole that we should value our diversity, not suppress it.
Breaking Down Barriers
How do we begin on the road toward a culturally competent workplace? The steps taken could be small –as simple as inviting employees to bring in dishes that reflect their cultural heritage, encouraging them to describe the cultural significance of the dish. The key is to create space for meaningful discourse, which will in turn create a more culturally open work environment.
1. Let your guard down: We must think of diversity as an asset, not a liability. Being culturally competent means understanding that every employee has an equally precious cultural heritage, and that one or two groups do not guide the reigns of diversity.
2. Take Action: Encourage employees to express themselves in a way that will familiarize others with their unique cultural and spiritual backgrounds. In this way, they will learn the value of different cultures and how they enrich the work environment, and the country as a whole.
3. Know you purpose: In educating for cultural competence, we need to understand its importance as part of continuing our adult education. Remember that we live in a country where diversity is ever present, and we cannot truly understand ourselves as Americans without understanding the value of the country’s diverse population. The workplace is a great place to start.”
Judi Lynn Lake resides in South Carolina, with her husband and 7 year old daughter. She successfully runs her own Advertising/PR Firm. Contact Judi at http://www.judilake.com. To learn more about Dr. Amaal V.E. Tokars’ mission at http://www.seducedbyfear.com
One Million Visionaries Walking A Road Less Traveled
In todays rapidly changing world, we need visionaries. Visionary mothers, visionary educators, visionary leaders, visionary children–visionaries, period!
Many think of visionaries being those who have a special “gift” for thinking big, thinking creatively, etc. But consider that a visionary is simply someone who chooses to walk his or her own heroic path in life, inspired by his or her own vision. Most people do not choose the visionary path.
Many people focus on achieving “success”, “financial freedom” etc.; however this is easy to do without living a visionary life.
Many people also focus on “making a difference”, “leaving a legacy”, and “doing my small part” to “change the world”; yet this is easily done without living a visionary life.
Further, people focus on attaining “salvation”, “enlightenment” or “transformation”. Once again, pursuing these objectives is quite easily done without living a visionary life.
You can live a visionary life while pursuing any of the above objectives, however most people dare not tread in the realm where the visionary lives. The visionary life is anything but “easy”. Indeed, it is a road less traveled.
What we tend to do in life is seek noble goals, values and ideals, while staying safely within the realm of our psychological/intellectual position. We could say this is living a “positionary life”. Or living beneath the level of vision.
If this is so for you, then you’d be content with actions and solutions that compromise your highest values and ideals, and your path of conscious/spiritual/intellectual growth/evolution. You might not act like you like such actions and solutions, but you’d tolerate those actions in your life, as if there is no other practical alternative.
Thus, in various areas of your life you’d see 1) a great disparity between what you say you value and how you act, OR 2) that you’ve come to accept very low values, dreams and ideals OR 3) that you are not consciously evolving both your values and your actions to higher levels as you could be (more about this later).
Here is the kicker. Living beneath the level of vision, one can often not even see much evidence for 1, 2 or 3 above (Unbridled self-honesty is more accessible and prevalent at the level of vision). Thus we cannot see how much we cannot see, and so we think there’s not much that we don’t see.
Look around at the world today, and what do we see? People who are perfectly content with compromise solutions, as if we as human beings are not capable of rising to new levels where compromise is not necessary. As evidence of positionary thinking, I’d point to the acceptance of compromise as a valid, worthwhile and even noble approach in life, in marriage, in international relations, in politics, in business, etc.
Visionaries in general do not espouse compromise. Visionaries face what few do. Visionaries are more like warriors than dreamers, in that they walk the path, they face what there is to face, and as a result a vision that others cannot see emerges. In the same way that the man who does not climb the mountain cannot see what’s on the other side, those who do not walk a visionary path cannot see what the visionary can.
There is conversation in conscious communities about forming a campaign to recruit and train one million of today’s most conscious change agents in how to stand for all of humanity and lead the kind of visionary life that creates a world that works for everyone. It’s called the One Million Visionaries Campaign.
This initiative would bring the most advanced methods to those most ready to usher in a new era of consciousness for humanity. Those who are creating our future must have access to deeper levels of courage, compassion and vision–and the skills to inspire even their adversaries to stand with them.
Such initiatives and visionaries are what the world needs now. When it comes to creating our future, who will you be? What will you stand for? And will you have the strength to stand in a world so bitterly divided?
Michael Skye, founder and CEO of VisionForce.com, works with a new breed of impassioned change agents around the world, who are giving their lives to stand for all of humanity. His “Visionary Mind Shifts” are available free at http://www.VisionForce.com/course.
How Can You Tell If Something Is Nonsense
How do we move beyond our prejudices to distinguish what is sensible and what is nonsensical?
When Albert Einstein created the Special and General Theory of Relativity, initially it seemed like nonsense, because nobody had ever thought of things like that before, but both the logical consistency of his arguments and the proof that was later found made them sensible theories.
Understanding the difference between sense and nonsense is vital to your well-being. Unless you can draw some clear understanding of something, you will be confused, and when you are confused, you cannot orient yourself to the world you live in.
Something makes sense when it aligns with an organ of perception: you can see it, hear it, or feel it.
However, this is not always an accurate measure of what is sensible. A mirage appears to be water until you get close to it and realize that you experienced an optical illusion. A hallucinogenic drug creates unusual experiences, until the drug wears off and you revise your opinion.
Sense, however, did prevail. You revisited the experience, perceived anew, and revised your opinion on what it meant.
So far, living on the level of the concrete and experiential, it appears rather clear the difference between sense and nonsense. The mirage was seen as nonsense after you got close to it. The unicorn was seen as nonsense when you recovered from the hallucinogenic drug and saw that you were looking at a plain horse.
But as consciousness advances, it has to embrace abstractions. An abstraction is best described as a statistical generalization. As a child, when you saw your first dog and then other dogs similar to it, but not like it, you created a generalization called dogs. Through a survey of many dogs, you were finally able to see that both a Chihuahua and a German Shepherd are both dogs.
In Quantum physics, you can’t really see subatomic particles, but you can infer their nature and their properties through the statistics of mathematics and the impressions of white dots and streaks they leave on a photographic plate. Thus, you can distinguish between an electron and a positron. You can also tell when a complex interaction takes place. For example, through a sophisticated instruments of observation and interpretation, you know when a negative pi meson collides with a proton. You then observe how the two particles annihilate each other, creating a lambda particle and a neutral K meson. Further observation informs you how these unstable particles live for only a billionth of a second. Now the neutral K meson decays into a positive pi meson and a negative pi meson, while the lambda particle decays into the original two particles, a negative pi meson and a proton.
Now, although this entire description is beyond the senses, it is not nonsense. This is because observation took place. This was done through mathematical descriptions and the use of highly sophisticated measuring devices. You may not have been able to “see” in a literal sense, but various instruments did that for you and your task was to interpret what they were telling you based on past knowledge.
In the realm of the abstract, unless you can test the idea in some way, it has a high tendency to be nonsense. In fact, the more removed it is from sense experience and the less testable it is, the more nonsensical it is likely to be.
It may be well-argued nonsense, but that does not make it sensible.
Something is considered sensible if you can arrive at it through induction or deduction.
Induction is working your way up from particulars to a general idea. For example, all dogs are dogs, regardless of size and predisposition. You arrive at that by examining a number of different dogs and pooling a list of characteristics. You know the difference between dogs and cats, because while both are four-legged, hairy, and have whiskers, they also have other characteristics which distinguish them from each other.
Deduction is working your way up from a general idea to a particular one. This is basically breaking down something into smaller and smaller units. You know, for example, that plants originate from seeds, by observing the nature of plants, both in their dead form, through dissection, and in their live form, by observing their growth and decay.
Nonsense comes in when we have to rely on authority. When things are believed not because some evidence was gathered about it, but because someone in authority said it was true.
Human beings love stories, and the more unusual and compelling the story, the more they are likely to believe it.
One example is channeling. People claim to be channeling all sorts of entities, from God to spirit guides to ascended masters, or even whole teams of enlightened beings. The mediums appear to change personalities, taking on unusual vocal intonations, unfamiliar gestures, and speaking words of surprising wisdom. If you hook them up to various instruments, they may even show physiological changes.
Is this nonsense?
It is an appeal to a higher authority, in this case someone from outside the system, talking from the other side, who appears to be giving us clear directions. In addition, our scientific instruments may even indicate that a change has indeed taken place.
On the other hand, you can get the same results if you use the hypothesis that a multiple personality phenomena is in effect. It has been shown over and over again that in disassociation, the new personality has unique traits, including more intelligence.
Thus, someone who claims to be a medium can be (a) a fake; (b) a multiple personality; or (c) genuine.
In trying to sort out sense from nonsense, you can discern what is true from what is false not on the basis of the reasonableness of their statements, but through putting to the test some of the things that they are saying.
A perfect example is Edgar Cayce. After he went into a trance state and started dictating healing formulas, he uttered unusual remedies. These were surprising because they were (a) outside known medical treatments and (b) highly effective. In this case, despite the highly unusual nature of the entire phenomenon, it is possible to rule out fakery and a multiple personality disorder, simply because he arrived at answers that were not in general circulation. There is no way to prove this to be nonsense; hence, based on available evidence, the best hypothesis is accepting him as he claimed to be.
In religion, occultism, philosophy and politics, the abstractions, unless they can be proven through evidence, should not be taken at face value. They tend to be nonsense. They are not accepted as this, however, because of the credible way that they are presented.
Most human misery, as far as I can tell, is following a well-reasoned line of thought from authority. When you think from your emotions, rather than from induction or deduction, and when you rely on authority, rather than evidence, then nonsense may very well have replaced a sensible way of thinking.
The most dangerous nonsense is that which is subtle. In the case of something bizarre, like the Edgar Cayce story, at first blush it does appear to be nonsense, but upon closer examination, it is not possible to cling to that verdict. On the other hand, when a politician says something there is a tendency to believe, although a closer examination will reveal no substantial evidence of the proof of his or her statements.
Thus, the element of sensationalism or the lack of it, is not a proper criteria to distinguish between sense and nonsense. Something may be hyped up and still be true. Something may be toned down and appear reasonable and still be false.
Insanity is not easy to perceive. Some of the brightest people have fallen into it. Apart from organic damage to the brain and the sense organs, insanity is the inability to distinguish between sense and nonsense. The rise and power of the Nazi party could be considered an outbreak of pervasive social insanity.
The scientific method of observation and experimentation is the highest form of reason invented. All other forms of reason may be entertaining, but they do not warrant the stamp of truth. True reason is the ability to sort out sense from nonsense on the basis of logical consistency and evidence.
Without the Age of Reason, the era we live in today, of marvelous scientific advancement could not have been possible. Prior to that time, humankind thought about things in an emotional, often nonsensical way.
Reason is not something relegated to the province of the scientist or the philosopher. It is something that we all need to live fulfilling lives. And the most reasonable form of reason is one that distinguishes sense from nonsense on the basis of careful inquiry, patient observation, and the accumulation of evidence.
Saleem Rana would love to share his inspiring ideas with you. Hunting everywhere for a life worth living? Discover the life of your dreams. His book, Never Ever Give Up is offered at no cost to stimulate your success. http://www.theempoweredsoul.com/enter.html
Watada’s Stand
A First Lieutenant in the U.S. Army has taken a stand. Ehren Watada, a 28-year-old Hawaii native, faces a court martial next month and up to 6 years in prison. He is the first commissioned officer in the U.S. to publicly refuse deployment to Iraq.
Overy 100,000 people have commented on one of the blogs were this man’s story and interview was published. Many of his peers call him a traitor and a coward. Others think he’s anything but that.
It’s easy to take a position on this young man’s decision, and that’s one of the fundamental problems with the world we live in. Actually, the problem lies within our methods of thinking, our consciousness. Yesterday’s consciousness is insufficient for the world we face today with all of it’s accelerating change, globalization, the advancement of technology, etc.
Someone thinking with yesterday’s consciousness, the positionary mind of the past, rushes to judgment without much honest inquiry. Rather than look to understand the person or organization they judge, they simply attack. It’s usually in defense of a position they formed long ago.
This is a very emotional issue, especially for those who chose to stand for their country by risking their lives by fighting at war even if they objected to the war. To be inspired by this man’s stand, it’s assumed they’d have to turn on their own stand. They are proud of the stand they took to fight, and feel that those who stand for their country by not fighting are invalidating or dishonoring them.
Some soldiers, in going to war, might judge those who don’t as cowardly. This affords them more pride and confidence in their decision, but the judgment itself is what devolves their stand into a position.
In our eagerness to stand for something, we too easily form a righteous position, from which we can no longer think honestly about the situation.
Isn’t honesty the quality of not refusing to look at or think about something, when forming one’s thoughts, words or opinions? Yet, when we form our thoughts and opinions with yesterday’s positionary thinking, those very opinions become walls beyond which we cannot see. Beyond the walls of our position, we can not see the humanity, the courage, the stand taken by the other side. And then we treat and speak to them as less than human.
Is it any wonder the world is in such a state of crisis?
What we’re lacking is a new form of consciousness. A visionary consciousness, the likes of which have been rare throughout history. Gandhi is a great example of someone with a visionary consciousness. What we’ll need going forward, however, and what I see is fast approaching, is a much more sophisticated and developed visionary consciousness higher level thinking methods that facilitate visionary thinking and make it much easier and more common place.
Eventually, evolution to a new kind of thinking will occur. Indeed, it must if we are to survive and thrive in this world.
Some are courageously undertaking the quest to evolve their consciousness even now, and are seeking out training for living as a visionary. Right now, the world needs people willing to live their lives standing for humanity.
If you are willing to live your life as a visionary, as someone who stands, as a hero for mankind, there’s no time to waste. The world needs visionary parents, teachers, entrepreneurs, lawyers, politicians, activists, artists. The world needs you. Are you willing to stand?
Michael Skye, founder and CEO of VisionForce.com, works with a new breed of impassioned change agents around the world, who are giving their lives to stand for all of humanity. The Visionary Mind Shifts are available free at http://www.VisionForce.com/course.
The Greatest Invention In The World
One of the most remarkable inventions ever in the history of the human race is the invention of the World Wide Web.
In the middle of the 15th century Johannes Gutenberg a German goldsmith, invented the movable type printing in Europe.
His technology replaced books that had to be created by hand . Knowledge spread like wildfire and the human race became more rational and less superstitious. The result, of course, was an improvement in the evolution of civilizations and the speed with which they arose.
The availability of books made the Renaissance possible. It facilitated scientific publication. It resulted in the collapse of the domination of dogmas of Catholicism because Martin Luther’s 95 Theses, posted on the door of his church, were widely printed and circulated.
Similarly the invention of the World Wide Web by Sir Timothy John “Tim” Berners-Lee, KBE (born June 8, 1955 in London, England) is changing the face of our world. Knowledge is now literally at your fingertips. If you need to find out anything, from the weather to some obscure facts in a specialized field of study, just type in a search for it and with the billions of websites now available, you are bound to find the answer. The entire database of human knowledge has now become available to everyone..
He was born in London, England. Both his parents were mathematicians and were part of the team that built one of the earliest computer, the Manchester Mark I. He learned to use mathematics everywhere, including at the dinner table.
At Oxford University, he built a computer with a soldering iron and an old television.
Graduating in physics in 1976, he went to work for a company called Plessey Controls Limited in Poole that specialized in traffic lights. Then in 1978, he created a typesetting software and an operating system when he worked for another company in Poole, D.G. Nash Limited. Berners-Lee then worked as an independent contractor for CERN. The NeXT cube became the first Web server. He proposed the concept of hypertext to facilitate sharing and updating research information. He built a prototype system named ENQUIRE.
In 1989, Berner’s Lee saw how to join hypertext with the Internet. In his own words:
“I just had to take the hypertext idea and connect it to the TCP and DNS ideas and ta-da! the World Wide Web.”
In 1990, working with Robert Cailliau, he produced a revision. He used ideas that were behind the Enquire system to fashion the World Wide Web.
He built the first web browser and editor called World Wide Web and the first web server called Hyper Text Transfer Protocol daemon.
CERN had the first web site in the world. It went online on August 6, 1991. It explained browsers, servers, and directories, and how to set them up.
Berners-Lee made his idea available freely. He did not reserve a patent or ask for royalties.
He has received numerous academic and business honors and awards, including USD $1.2 million by President of Finland, Tarja Halonen, on April 15, 2004, as the first recipient of Finland’s Millennium Technology Prize for inventing the World Wide Web.
He was also given the rank of Knight Commander (the second-highest rank in the Order of the British Empire) by Queen Elizabeth II. This was part of the New Year’s Honors ceremony, on July 16, 2004.
The 1999 Time Magazine edition called him one of the 100 most influential people of the twentieth century.
Today he lives in Lexington, Massachusetts (USA) with his wife and two children.
The world wide web is literally an artificial global brain, where information is contributed by millions of people around the world and made publicly available to all.
The next step in the evolution of knowledge will be when the entire university system will be coordinated and organized and made available online at no cost, and anyone will be able to learn anything without having to worry about location, cost, admission standards or any of the other barriers that keep education reserved for the wealthier people in the wealthier countries. The future holds the promise that everybody, all over the world, will have the chance to be literate. The technology exists for that to happen.
As long as the internet is allowed to continue to grow without interference from controlling powers, knowledge will also continue to flourish organically and bring humans together in a common understanding of how to make this world a better place.
The invention of the World Wide Web is in our day what the Renaissance and the Age of Enlightenment was for people of an earlier era. It may even prove to be more of a giant leap for humankind than the landing on the moon.
Saleem Rana would love to share his inspiring ideas with you. Hunting everywhere for a life worth living? Discover the life of your dreams. His book, Never Ever Give Up is offered at no cost to stimulate your success. http://www.theempoweredsoul.com/enter.html
Understanding Memory Lapses
Most people think that memory lapses are for the hopelessly disorganized. This is because some have systems. For instance, the keys go into the key jar.
The point is, compulsive list makers never come home from the supermarket without the items they intend to buy. Imagine their annoyance when eventually they take three trips between two places before they remember why they went from one place to another anyway!
A lot of us, faced with these glitches, worry that Alzheimer’s is just around the corner. Experts are reassuring us that memory lapses are part of the normal wear and tear that goes along with middle age.
No one is exactly sure why memory goes downhill. It may be that we lose brain cells as we age or the remaining cells do not communicate with one another as effectively. But, the result is well known: mental gaffes cause embarrassment and inconvenience.
For example, Linda, 35, went to her son’s school with a big cake thinking it was Family Day. As it turned out, the schedule of the Family Day is set on the next day. Her son was surprised to see her and overjoyed when she brought out his favorite chocolate cake. Of course, she had to bring the same thing the next day, this time for real.
Mental Congestion
Attention is the gateway to retention. Multitasking makes it hard to commit things to memory in the first place. If the information does not get in to begin with, forget trying to save it and access it later. If multiple activities crowd your day, do not rely on your recall skills. Make lists, take notes, and ask others to do the same.
Interestingly, people tend to blame age, rather the busy nature of their work for their slips.
Take the common lapse of forgetting someone’s name. It happens to everybody, young and old. Names are difficult to handle because they are abstract. The person’s face and his name are not logical ideas for the brain to link together. According to neurologist Barry Gorden, M.D., Ph.D., the older we get, the more data we have to sort through in our brains. Some mental lapses are nothing but congestion.
Also, we blank on names because we know too many of them. Anxiety makes it worse by creating more traffic. That is why the name often pops into our minds later when the mental traffic has died down.
Types Of Memory
There are three kinds of memory, with each one responding differently to the aging process.
Episodic memory is for recalling the name of a restaurant or a movie plot from last week. It starts to decline in our early forties.
Semantic memory is the type that gives us the ability to collect and retain new facts and figures. It holds up pretty well, which is why we know what a blog is but forget your dentist’s address.
Procedural memory is for tasks we do automatically, such as playing the piano or driving a car. This is fairly resilient. So, even if we can’t think of our friend’s phone number, we can press the right keys on the phone’s pad.
Is Memory Lapse An Illness?
Certain medical problems can interfere with our ability to recall. These may include depression, high blood pressure, thyroid disease, a concussion, diabetes, and side effects from some drugs. While these can affect how we recall things, it does not mean that we can treat memory lapses the same way we treat illnesses. Improving our diet and lifestyle can help us get back on track.
Let us manage our stress. Try whatever works for us is yoga, gardening, walking, etc. Not only does tension distract you, making it hard to learn and remember things, but it also takes a direct toll on the brain.
Be aware of the reasons for such memory lapses and we will be more understanding and tolerant of our selves.
Some people will do anything to make your life miserable. You can find out how to finally stop difficult people from ruining your life by dominating, winning, and changing their hearts at the authors website at: http://www.dealing-with-difficult-people.com
Setting Psychic Boundaries part 2
But with anything that you are learning and developing you need to do develop your psychic with balance, and caution. You must put a general statement to the universe of what you would like to handle. You set boundaries for what you can and can’t take in. You clearly define the boundaries of contact. You need to remember that at all times you are the one in control and you can stop contact at any time. You shut down your receiver and stop transmitting at will. You need to become aware of when you are physically drained, and vulnerable, and when you are stronger.
You must also become aware of how to ground yourself, when you need to put up a psychic shield or a wall and how to do this. You must firmly respect your own space and others. No one has the right to control you or bring you under his or her will. You don’t have the right to do that to anyone else either. Also only what you allow to take place can take place. If you don’t invite or allow contact, contact won’t happen. Some psychics that I knew in the past, refused to see anything visible like a ghost. They will only hear the words or hear the thoughts. Others are more open to seeing graphic images if it will help solve crimes, and stop the person responsible. But this is very advanced and it requires a very strong and courageous medium channel.
A technique of grounding that I read in James Van Praagh’s book Heaven, is to imagine that there is a silver cord tied to your tail bone and ankles and that it goes down to the center of the earth. It wraps around the core of the earth. Feel how the cord becomes firm and holds you to the earth. Feel that you are firmly planted on the earth and held by this silver cord. Say to yourself, “I’m fully grounded to the earth.” At this time you can reiterate to the universe and to anyone else out there of your boundaries, and that you can break off contact at anytime if these boundaries are crossed or if it no longer feels safe. Another technique of grounding is to imagine that you are wrapped in a cocoon of light, everything is filled with light and the light wraps around you. See that the psychic energy is contained in a column of light that passes through you directly into the ground, so that it doesn’t stay in you or on you.
At the end of any conscious psychic session it is necessary to cleanse the energy off you. You can do this by first placing your hands palms down on the top of your head and imagine that you are wiping off thick clear jelly from your head, face and neck. You always clear off to the sides or downward. Imagine as you pass your hands over that a pure white light is entering into each area that your hands pass over.
This jelly that you cleared off with your hands, you now put your hands together and make an action like you are cleaning off crumbs from your hands with a movement that is directed down to the earth. You can also flick your fingers downward as if you are shaking off water. Start again with your hands on your chest, and imagine that you are clearing off this thick jelly, wipe your hands together down into the earth.
Remember clean out to the sides and downward. Go back to your back, hips and buttocks, wipe off and clean your hands into the earth, and then go back to your arms. Do one arm at a time. You can make a downward brushing motion with your arms and legs. What you say within is “Thank you for this session. I now chose to conclude this session and I’m now clearing this energy into the earth.” copyright 2006 Yoga Kat
Yoga Kat teaches children’s yoga ages 3-6, 7-12yrs and Adults in NJ. The Author of the book DAUGHTER BELOVED and created a children’s affirmation CD and an adult affirmation CD. Available for speaking and reached at yogakat@verizon.net or 201 970-9340–COMING SOON -http://www.thecircleofpeace.com
Who Am I?
I feel so strange right now. So many thoughts are racing through my mind. I don’t know why I am anymore. I just know I am.
Existence seems to be unimportant and seems to consist of nothing. I know I have a reason for being, but what is that reason? Singing, Music — who I am — it’s the way I feel, what I think. It’s who I am. But is that my real reason for being?
I sometimes wonder why I was put on this Earth. Why there is such a thing as life and what made it so. It is the same cycle, nothing ever changes.
Life and death. Then there is the in-between. I am in-between. AT times I feel like I was never really born, I have just always been.
I want to be different. Who am I? I mean really? Oh, I know I am a girl with ambitions. My features are the same as everyone else has, only a different combination.
I know how I feel and what I think. But what is my purpose? Is there a reason for that purpose? Do I make a difference?
Is there really such a thing as God? I used to think there was. It was a whole feeling, but now I question that felling. It’s not that I am against the idea of a God, but if He really exists, who is He? Did I believe just because I needed something to believe in?
I feel so empty right now, yet it can’t really be explained as such. Sometimes when I am sitting quietly, little voices will run through my brain. I never know exactly what they are saying. They start out soft and end up quite loud. I have to shout “Stop!” so I won’t hear them anymore. What do they mean? Am I going crazy? I don’t think so.
Anxiety I suppose, or so I have read. I am a mass of cells –= a structure. A mind. A body. What makes me tick? I have dreams, but I know that is not what makes me continue on.
I am so afraid, but I don’t know of what. My casual front is strong, but underneath I am tired, unhappy, frightened, and alone– always alone. I am surrounded by friends and family, but still, I am alone. Alone in my thinking. Alone in my soul. I am part of no one, and no one is a part of me.
Belonging to one person. To be protected, and cherished. Becoming one soul, yet remaining an individual. Lasting relationships - very scary. Maybe that person will find out who I really am and hurt me. But who am I, really? If I don’t know how can anyone else?
I’m not going through an identity crises. My feet are firmly planted in the ground. I just want to know my reason for life. For existence. Where am I headed and why. Is there such a thing as eternity? Life after death? Or do we just die and that’s the end. I don’t know what or who to believe in.
What is real and what is not? Maybe I am simply a shadow of something in another place. What is truth? Truth is what you choose to believe. But my truth may not be yours, and therefore either one of us could be mistaken.
What is real? Am I? But how do I know that I am real? Maybe I am an illusion in a game that is being played. I have been taught that what is real is tangible. Yet I am tangible, but am I real?
Reality is a truth, yet reality is not a tangible item. Everyone has their own concept of their own reality, or what they have been taught is real. But there again, it is someone else’ truth. God is supposed to be real, and yet he is not tangible.
Does that not go against what I have been taught? Faith in God and people must be the only answer to these endless questions. I fell like a ship that has never sailed and is tied up. I want to see the world through my eyes, not someone else’s. I am pitted against something, but what is that something? Maybe I am pitted against myself.
Copyright 1995
Jaci Rae is a #1 Best Selling author of The Indie Guide to Music, Marketing and Money and Winning Points with the Woman in Your Life One Touchdown at a Time. Book Jaci for your next show: http://www.jacirae.com/ and hit contact button for her publicist.
The Dating Game Part II: How to Become the Right Person with a Rewarding Relationship
In Part I of this two part series, I discussed how to find a date, how to perfect your online profile and discussion topics. In this part, I want to discuss relationships and how to succeed in one.
Once you have conquered the dating scene, how do you inspire the person who has sparked your interest in a relationship to want the same? That can be the hardest stepping stone for those who always seem to date, but never find a partner.
Why is that? There are many reasons that can factor into that. You may be giving off signals that say you’re too needy or desperate for a healthy relationship partner to be interested in or perhaps you’re drawn to the ‘dangerous type,’ better known as the serial dater or heartbreaker.
If any of these scenarios fit your description, you need to look is inside yourself and make a change. I am certain you’ve heard, “Before you can find the ‘right person,’ you must be the ‘right person.’” Sound familiar?
You can be given all the information you need to find someone but if you are the same person with the same values and belief’s about yourself you’ve always held, you will attract the same type you have always attracted in the past.
You have to be the right person naturally. You can’t make yourself into the right person, but improving your self-talk and how you feel about yourself will attract the right person for you. You will never be the right person until you are the right person, meaning that you have to make the way you think and feel about yourself right.
The law of attraction is: Similar kinds attract similar kinds. So first you must get your own life together and stop putting out the vibes of “I’m desperate to be in a relationship.” “If I could just find the one, I would be the one.” Or “Once I am in a healthy relationship I will be able to calm down and be happy.”
You need to calm down and be happy before you meet the right person or you will end up in the same cycle you have always been, “with the wrong person.” A rule of thumb is this: If you wouldn’t date or marry you as you are right now, why would anyone else? Change the way you feel about yourself inside and the rest will fall into place. You can’t be part of a great relationship until you are great yourself.
A simple step that may seem silly, but is highly effective is to step in front of your mirror and repeat several times a day the following (even if you are a man do this. No one will be watching you but you): “You are gorgeous darling!” “I love me so much!” (Throw your arms around yourself.) “I am worthy of the best!” and other affirming statements.
Remember that all statements are statements of self-disclosure. You will automatically attract what you believe about yourself both consciously and unconsciously. Did you know that our subconscious mind controls 87% of our thinking? Our conscious mind only controls 13%! If you have built in your subconscious mind with your conscious talk that you aren’t worthy, that’s what will be projected and you will attract those that aren’t worthy. This exercise is to reprogram your subconscious mind.
The next step is to change your pattern. While the man or woman you are dating may look different, sound different and come from an entirely different background from the other “bad relationships” you’ve had, are they really different? The philosopher George Santayana said, “Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” In other words, if you want the same results, do the same things you have always done. If you want different results then you’ve got to do something different!
To get different results you may need to ask outside advice from objective observers. If you have already changed how you feel about yourself you should be attracting different people. However, if you seem to still attract “bad relationships,” you may need a second opinion. Use someone you trust who is in a great relationship to offer their advice.
Now that you’ve changed how you feel about yourself, how do you keep a relationship an ever lasting one? With rumors flying about Britney Spears and Kevin Federline’s break-up on the horizon (what a shocker!); millions of pages dedicated to the separation and divorce of Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson (I was hopeful, but wary). Where is the hope for the rest of us?
How can we, as “mere mortals,” believe in ever lasting love? In the back of our minds we think that these celebrities have everything any couple could possibly need to enjoy the happiest “ever after” life imagined. I can’t tell you how many times I hear people say, “If only we had more money;” “A bigger house;” “If I were better looking;” “If I lost more weight;” “My life would be perfect;” “Our relationship wouldn’t have so much stress;” “I would be happy.”
We look at the famous and say, “They are the ‘beautiful’ people.” “They travel the world.” “They have beautiful mansions and lots of money.” “They have an army of people waiting to do their bidding: publicists, managers, accountants, housekeepers and chiefs.” “If only I were in their shoes.”
What a great example and lesson to all of us “not so fortunate” people who aren’t blessed with ‘their’ lives and the kind of money they posses; that neither money nor physical perfection makes a relationship happy or successful.
Time, effort and determination are what make a relationship thrive. I’m not implying that these celebrities don’t put the time and effort into their relationships needed, only that all the things we say, “If only we had…” won’t make our relationships last longer or be any happier than theirs were.
Key factors to a lasting relationship are laughter, a sense of humor about life as well as a lot of hard work. These three things have always been a common thread for every successful, happy, long-term relationship I have interviewed over the years. Every one of the couples state the same thing: Work hard; don’t go to bed angry, resolving “issues” right away; and laugh with each other often.
I was told that people who read the comic strips in their newspaper first live longer while people who head straight for the news or obituaries tend to live shorter lives. I haven’t been able to find the study that backs this up, but it makes sense. Most balanced comedians, without drug and alcohol problems, live longer lives and have happier marriages.
All of the steps listed here that take you from finding a date to ever lasting love are only a small sampling of ideas and help. Remember to start at the shallow end before you dive into the deep waters, a life vest may not always be available.
The last tip I will leave you with is something I call Soul Gazing. It’s the simple technique of gazing into your partner’s eyes. I usually recommend 15 minutes, but in the beginning, 2-3 minutes is fine. No talking, no looking away. I have seen this technique strengthen relationships that were already strong and help those relationships that were on the brink of disaster. Try it.
If you want to have the love you deserve, remember my simple rule: Love is a gift, it’s not a right. Love is a decision, it’s not a feeling. Make the decision to change how you feel about yourself and how you treat others and you too can have the lasting and deep love you deserve.
Jaci Rae is a #1 Best Selling author Winning Points with the Woman in Your Life One Touchdown at a Time. Book Jaci for your next show: http://www.jacirae.com/ and hit contact button for her publicist.
Being on the Team - Becoming Better Friends
Men tend to need physical contact to verify their relationships, while women tend to need an emotional connection to validate theirs. Men need that tactile moment that will break the emotional barrier for them and women need emotional stimulation to break the ice with them.
Men are more visual and women are more auditory. You can see the conflict that arises and why it seems harder for men to create a friendship with a woman than visa versa. For the visual person it can be hard. Even if you are a visual person and cannot change your initial reaction to external stimuli, you can become a seeker of emotional intimacy before you dive into the physical realm.
To help achieve emotional intimacy, thereby becoming a better friend, you need to nurture your partner’s soul by honoring him / her and validating who your partner is. Here are a few ways to do that: