For Greater Effectiveness, Learn How To Give Feedback
A manager who coaches others needs to provide feedback that keeps them focused and on track. Feedback is also a critical element for working out relationships with coworkers, friends and family members. Unfortunately, “feedback” can become a euphemism for not very constructive criticism.
Feedback can and should be a way of helping another person become more effective. You can help others increase their effectiveness by helping them to understand both what you observed about their actions, and how those actions affected you.
Feedback, at its best, involves sharing both facts and feelings in a way that supports someone who is willing to accept your information.
Use these tips to improve the quality of the feedback you offer others.
1. Give feedback when it is solicited, rather than imposing it on an unwilling listener. If you must offer unsolicited feedback, first say that you would like to give some feedback and ask if this is a good time to do so. If now does not work, schedule it for a later time.
2. Provide well-timed feedback — usually at the earliest possible moment after the given behavior. Feedback given long after there is any opportunity to correct a problem will usually sound like criticism. However, you may still have to wait until the recipient is ready to hear what you have to say.
3. Give descriptive rather than evaluative feedback. Report on the facts or behaviors you observed, and the impact of those behaviors. Avoid pejorative words like dumb, crazy or stupid.
4. Be specific rather than general. “I observed this twice,” is more specific than “You always…”
5. Check to be sure the receiver understood your communication. A good way to do this is to ask them to tell you what they heard you say.
6. Offer feedback that is useful to the recipient. Think about their level of understanding, and ability to use the information. It is useless to give a novice complex, sophisticated details that she doesn’t understand. On the other hand, it may be considered insulting to call someone’s attention to a problem of which she is already aware.
If you want the recipient of your feedback to change their behavior as a result of you conversation, do not assume that giving the feedback is enough. Ask specifically for the change you want. For example, “Next time, please call me as soon as you know that the schedule needs to be adjusted. O.K.?”
Others will be more willing to give you the feedback you need to increase your own effectiveness if you demonstrate your willingness to receive it.
1. Ask others for their thoughts and feelings.
2. Actively listen to what is said. Paraphrase what you hear and ask if you are correct. Ask questions only for clarification.
3. Accept what you hear and avoid trying to explain or defend your actions.
4. Let others know how you use their feedback.
Remember, effective feedback gives you the information you need to keep learning and growing.
Communicate skillfully about sensitive subjects. Http://www.DareToSayIt.com/blog
Laurie Weiss, Ph.D. is a Master Certified Coach and communication expert. Dr. Weiss has spent 35 years helping clients resolve conflict in business and personal relationships. Email feedback@laurieweiss.com
The Art of Remarkable Leadership
Leadership is defined as the capacity or ability to guide others to accomplish an objective. To provide leadership, one needs to be a leader.
The following is a quote that captures the essence of a great leader:
The six most important words: “I admit I made a mistake.”
The five most important words: “You did a good job.”
The four most important words: “What is your opinion?”
The three most important words: “If you please.”
The two most important words: “Thank you.”
The one most important word: “We.”
Author Unknown
Wouldn’t you love to work with a leader who is willing to speak these words? It has been found that the most reliable predictor of employee satisfaction is trust and confidence in a company’s top leadership.
What qualities do you believe are required by a good leader and how does one become a leader? Although some people have natural leadership skills, good leaders are made not born. We are all involved in leadership capacities in our everyday lives. Whether we are leading a business, government, family, organization or arranging a dinner or household, leadership abilities are required.
Five of the most important skills of an effective leader are being trustworthy and ethical, the ability to be an effective communicator, good self-management, maintaining focus, and courage. Let’s explore these qualities.
First, a leader’s credibility is based on what he or she does and their beliefs and values (which incorporates an attitude of service regarding the needs of others.) If there is a discrepancy between actions and values than the leader is out of integrity. This clearly will be noticed and the leader will be less effective.
Second is being a good communicator. When a leader is clear about their direction and purpose then it is easy to convey this to others. If a leader is having trouble articulating what he or she wants to have happen, then it would be valuable to re-evaluate the goals. As well when one doesn’t have a clear picture about what is going on then it would be a challenge to talk about it.
The third quality is self-management or what many describe as life balance. It is important to acknowledge the emotional, spiritual, physical and psychological aspects of life. People are not one-dimensional. If one is physically exhausted or emotionally drained, they are not operating on all cylinders. Leaders need to continue to self-nurture in order to maintain the ability to provide positive, effective leadership.
Fourth is focus. Leaders are able to see the big picture and pinpoint what is important. If they become bogged down in details, preoccupied with perfection or insist on doing everything themselves, then their focus is off. The task is about leading rather than doing.
The fifth skill is courage. The willingness to do something different; to be open to new possibilities and be daring enough to implement them. Let’s be clear, this does not mean that there is no fear, but rather the desire to move forward in spite of it. Many companies would not exist today if owners had given into their fears.
Successful organizations have leaders who set high standards and communicate well. If your company is large it’s impossible to know all your employees, however you need to know many of them, as well as knowing what is happening. When changes are occurring, communicate the information to staff. When things go wrong, as they do from time to time, explore what occurred, rectify the errors without blaming others and move on. This sets the example for staff.
One woman executive had many of the leadership skills which have been described. Her staff felt she was supportive, encouraging and helpful, a mentor and a role model. However she also had been raised with the belief that men were more successful leaders than women. This notion interfered in her attaining higher positions within her company. To become the dynamic leader she wanted, her learning required her to explore this inhibiting belief.
In speaking with university students who had several work placements, they stated that although they had learned a great deal from having good bosses and a positive work environment, they learned just as much, if not more, from jobs where the boss was difficult and an ineffective manager. From adversity can come the greatest learning. They had learned what kinds of environments and management they did not want to experience. Consider the bosses, managers and leaders with whom you have worked. What were the things that you liked about their style and what did not serve you well?
In order to be most effective leadership must be conscious. The awareness of what you are doing and how it affects the company’s objectives and the staff morale is paramount. A good leader should not only focus on what he/she thinks is best, but must also consider the greater good. It is now becoming important to think beyond the company and consider what impact the business is having on the community and environment. Many companies are now encouraging and providing the opportunity for their employees to volunteer in the community. This directive comes from the top down, the leaders.
Great leaders are involved in an on going process of self-study, education and action. Determine where you are on your path to providing great leadership and what actions you need to implement in order to increase your skills.
Copyright 2007, Gail Solish.
Gail Solish provides Executive/Personal coaching to managers, directors and executives focused on workplace development and relationship management. Claim your FR-EE e-course “Unleash Your Potential and Increase Productivity and Fulfillment” at http://www.ActualizeYourGoals.com
The Education System Employs Technology To Help Stay In Touch
Technology has become a part of almost every aspect of the workforce. Many industries and organization are now reaping the benefits of its many uses, and the education system is no exception. Communications servers are now making it easier than ever for school officials to notify parents of a child’s absence, for parents to notify the school of a child’s absence, and for teachers to offer information and assistance concerning various homework assignments.
Through the use of a computer system, an automated dial system can be configured to provide pre-recorded information upon request, and updating this information has become easier than ever. Also, through the use of voice mail, students and parents can leave messages that can be easily access by school officials. Likewise, students can quickly access critical information as desired to find various homework assignments, an option that is especially useful if a student has been absent on a particular day.
These communications servers are designed to streamline information and messaging within the school system’s administrative and teaching community. This type of system can also help facilitate communications between various designated groups, clubs, the entire student body, and parents. Through this, everyone can stay better informed of special events and check the system frequently for any updates or changes that may have occurred.
These types of communications systems are very affordable, and use an easy to use voice processing system that will make communications more convenient across the board. Now, as soon as events are scheduled or changes are made, the messages can be recorded and immediately available to students and parents. Parents will also be able to call the system and obtain this information more easily than ever before. The results are now more instantaneous.
Teachers can also post informative information about homework assignments, upcoming exams, and school-wide testing that students can access on a daily basis from the comfort of their own homes. The use of websites has also served to promote this type of instant communication, and the two systems can be used in conjunction with one another to increase communications and raise awareness.
There are several companies that offer such communications servers and services, each using similar technology. As the voice capabilities improve, so will the level of technology. As more functions are added to the system, more information will be readily available to students, school officials, and parents that will only help to unify the overall educational experience and foster a more comprehensive learning environment.
Voicegate Corporation is an innovative leader in the voice processing, voice recording/call logging, call centre and emergency preparedness/business continuity notification systems industries.
http://www.voicegate.com/emergency_response.html
What You Think Of Me Is None Of My Business
How often do you hold your tongue and not speak the truth of what you are thinking?
What do you love doing that you haven’t done in a long time?
Does your creativity get shoved into the box of what you think will please others?
If so, you may be letting your fear of criticism rule your life. This is one of the key sources of struggle people face. It is easy to try to please everyone all the time.
We tend to moderate our words, our actions, and look over our shoulder to see who’s watching. Actually pleasing everyone all the time is actually a losing battle!
When we’re caught up with what we’re supposed to do we tend to stifle our energy and enthusiasm for whatever project we’re pursuing. When we trust our actions and choices, we see that everything gets easier and we’re in the flow of the work. There is more consistent energy. Our energy is not bolstered when others applaud us and deflated when others have a negative reaction to what we’ve said or done.
This is contrary to how many of us were raised. We were supposed to listen to how things were to be done and do our best to copy that. There was a right and wrong way for every project to be completed. Rarely were our personality styles considered as to what method would work best for us to approach any situation.
Terry Cole-Whitaker wrote the book titled, What You Think Of Me Is None Of My Business. I remember when I first heard this title. Over the years it has come to mean more to me as I’ve realized the peace that can come from letting go of need for love and approval for everything I do.
Is this selfish to put our OWN approval above others’ approval? This may have been the message of our childhood. When we have healthy self-love we are able to be comfortable with what we are doing and are able to accept that others may have their own way to complete a task as well. Our self-care is essential for us to be a fully engaged individual in any situation, whether it is a personal relationship or a business project.
HOW CAN YOU CHANGE YOUR HABIT OF PLEASING OTHERS?
It first takes the decision that you are going to live life for yourself. This isn’t to say you are not being considerate of others. On the contrary, you will value and respect them more than ever.
Then make a conscious effort to speak the truth, no matter what. How often to we filter our words carefully to avoid offending anyone? This only makes connecting more difficult and awkward. It is really pretty obvious when a person is not being authentic. You are not doing anyone a favor by not being real.
This process will not happen in just a few leaps and bounds. Small steps are the most effective way to make any change. You have to be comfortable with what you are doing to have this be a smooth process.
Give yourself a moment before speaking to check how authentically you are about to respond. Speaking the truth does not mean that you have to fully disclose all of your thoughts. That isn’t necessary. Healthy boundaries for your privacy are appropriate.
And, realize that some people in your life may not be comfortable with your honesty. They are probably not people who are adding positive energy to you anyway.
How would your life be different if you were living congruently with your ideas and values?
How would your relationships be enriched by being all of who you are?
How would your productivity be affected?
What would it mean to your bottom line to be more aware of yourself and how you relate to others? Check out the resources and services offered by Suzanne Holman, MAEd, Exuberant Productivity Coach, found at http://www.exuberantproductivity.com
Six Steps To Mastering The Art Of Great Conversation
Becoming a great conversationalist takes proper planning and hard work. But, mastering the art of conversation is worth it. Outstanding conversation gets noticed and so does the person behind it.
Have you ever been to a social event and watched someone with an “Aw Shucks, I’m from a farm down home” look about them because they can’t string two words together. They may be too shy or just have nothing to say. Either way, it’s not pretty. In most cases it’s not because a person can’t hold a conversation, it’s because they haven’t prepared for conversation. As with everything in life, great conversationalists understand this simple but important tenet: proper planning prevents poor performance (P5).
The following six steps should help you be better prepared when you next enter a room full of people.
Say something
Readers are leaders and good conversationalists. Keep up to speed with the latest events happening in your world through newspapers, television and radio. There’s always something topical happening … make sure you know about it and that you have an opinion on it.
Ooze with confidence
Confidence is a massively attractive trait. People like talking to confident, authoritative and powerful people because it makes them feel safe. You’ll attract more people to you than bees to a honey pot if you can appear confident.
Eye contact is critical
Make sure that you establish good eye contact when speaking to someone. Not the Charles Manson “thousand yard stare” kind of eye contact … that’s just scary. Never break eye contact when you’re busy making an important point. If you start looking like a sneaky, edgy Coyote, it puts doubt on your integrity and on the validity of your words. So does touching your face, nose and ears whilst speaking. This just makes you look like a fibber. This normally happens when you’re not sure of yourself or your subject. Sigmund Freud once said that the body oozes deceit.
Compliments help you make friends
We all love compliments don’t we? Make the compliment sincere, brief and specific. Most important of all, the compliment must be based on fact otherwise it just becomes empty flattery. For instance, if you saw someone helping an old lady carry her groceries to her car, your compliment would go something like this: “When I saw you helping that old lady with her groceries the other day, I realized that you’re a kind and thoughtful person.” That compliment is based on evidence.
However, if you say, “That’s a beautiful red tie you’re wearing … wow, you’re a real go-getter and confident person.” Well, that’s just plain old flattery, isn’t it? Wearing a red tie is certainly not evidence of any kind of personality trait, is it? Of course, if someone compliments you, you should react in an appropriate way. When you receive a compliment, simply smile and say “thank you”. By doing this, you do wonders for your confidence and you acknowledge the thoughtfulness (and courage) of the person who complimented you.
Become a great listener
Any conversation should follow the 80/20 rule. You do 20 percent of the talking and the rest of the time you’re listening. People like to talk, so let them talk. It makes them feel important and it turns you into a friend. And, the bonus is that they think you’re a great conversationalist. Sometimes its hard to get someone to open up. You can get them talking by …
Asking great questions
Ask elaborating questions that force a person to open up. Here are some examples: “Really?” “How did that make you feel?” “That must have been exciting. Tell me more.”
Try some of these tips next time you’re at a cocktail party or conference and become the person people want to listen to.
Kevin Sinclair is the publisher and editor of Be Successful News, a site that provides information and articles on how to succeed in your own home or small business. http://www.besuccessfulnews.com/